Men seem to be getting it pretty rough these days. Everyone is always telling us to stop doing this and start doing that and calling us man-children running around with bigger and more expensive toys than we had when we were boy-children. Well, I think it might just be time to put an end to it all…
Now before you go and do something stupid, I’m not actually saying “Dude, have you thought about committing suicide?” The kind of killing I’m talking about has an age-old tradition attached to it spanning centuries and cultures. I’m talking about the rite of passage that men once had to take in which they boy would die so that the man could live. These ceremonies range from primitive forms of bungee jumping to circumcision rituals to putting your hand in a glove full of stinging ants (read some more horrifying examples here http://www.artofmanliness.com/2010/02/21/male-rites-of-passage-from-around-the-world/).
These rites of passage are necessary for us to regain our masculine power and keep the balance of the world. In cultures where these ceremonies are not practiced, video games and porn step in, making up for the lack of dominant male energy by allowing these boys to live vicariously through the screen. While engaged in these virtual activities, their brains fire off dopamine as though they were participating in real life.
For women, this rite of passage happens when they get their first period. Ask any woman if she remembers the incident and I guarantee she will not only recall it, but tell you a story of the emotions she felt at that moment. It’s a profound experience and one of the reasons women mature faster than men. They know on a subconscious level the severity of their choices from here on in.
So what can men do to move themselves toward this new path, this new version of themselves? The first step is to cut back on the porn and video games, but there’s also a lot of work to be done.
- Take responsibility for your life. Recognize that wherever you are in life at this moment, you brought yourself here. You can attribute your actions to things other people did to make you react, but the truth is, no one else made you do it but you. Own your actions and your emotions. No one can make you mad; you make yourself mad. Someone might do something that goes against your wishes or your plan but if you’re mad, only you are responsible.
- Do things that scare you. What’s the one thing you wish you could do but never try because it scares you too much? Do it. There are significant benefits that result from stepping outside your comfort zone and doing things that scare you. Your confidence increases significantly if you can face your fear and survive. You will experience life more fully if you do things that make you feel slightly uncomfortable. I’ve built a pretty nice life by doing just that. I’ve changed the rules of my comfort zone. If I’m fully comfortable I start feeling uncomfortable because I know I’m not growing. My default comfort zone is now set to “mildly uncomfortable”.
Try following these two shifts in your thoughts and actions, wave goodbye to that little boy who was addicted to Pornhub and Grand Theft Auto, and become the man you were destined to be.
Yours in manliness,
Devon OB Ash
Devon helped me change the way I see myself, which has greatly improved my interactions with others. Uncertainty and fear have been replaced by confidence and optimism. Thanks for unlocking my potential!